Posts by Al Kratina
An Open Letter to the Internet: I’m Sorry We Don’t Like The Same Movies
Cult Cinema: Volume 13: Dear Internet, I’m sorry that we don’t like the same movies. I’ve let you down. After all that you’ve given me, from the questionably legal pornography, to the gory photos of car crash victims and dead … [Read the Rest]
Methamphysical Society for Research, Development, and Tweaking
Cult Cinema: Volume 12 It’s tough to be straight-edge. By virtue of being drug- and alcohol-free, the whole world thinks you’re some Christian hardcore kid from Boston who only speaks in Minor Threat lyrics. But on the other hand, you … [Read the Rest]
The Ancient Mystic Order of Homeroom
Cult Cinema:- Article #11 Cult of the Week: Volume 11 Art imitates life. Until art gets so thoroughly processed by focus groups and marketing departments that it wins an MTV Movie Award. Then, art turns into product, which is imitated … [Read the Rest]
Italian Institute of Stupidity Science and Philosophy
Cult Cinema: Volume 10 Horror fans are a mysterious, cultish bunch. Or at least, they like to think they are, imagining themselves the vanguard of the underground; Morlocks feeding off pampered, mainstream Eloi dandies with D&G sunglasses and designer perfume. … [Read the Rest]
The Star Trek Mystic Awareness School
Cult Cinema: Volume 9 It’s common geek knowledge that Star Trek is a smarter version of Star Wars. However, this should not be the badge of honour that so many Trekkies wear with pride, since Star Wars is essentially what … [Read the Rest]
Hostel, Torture Porn, and the Blood Worship Doctrine
Cult Cinema: Volume 8 At their best, horror films hold society up to a funhouse mirror, providing a grotesque yet revealing reflection of cultural concerns, values, and above all, fears. And then there’s torture porn, in which the only insights … [Read the Rest]
The Brotherhood of the Eternal Comedy
Cult Cinema: Volume 7 Good comedy is a mix of the familiar, the unexpected, and the shocking. Which is an elaborate way of saying that ending a knock-knock joke with a line about killing a baby is a sure way … [Read the Rest]
The Barkerians
Cult Cinema: Volume 6 In the 1980s, author Clive Barker was dubbed the new face of horror. And what a face it was, one that looked like it should be fellating both Lord Byron and Aleister Crowley during a sex … [Read the Rest]
Academy for Tarantino-Guided Imagery
Cult Cinema: Volume 5 Quentin Tarantino is every video store clerk’s idol, and every film critic’s nightmare. Venerated by midnight movie buffs and Blockbuster cashiers for his unadulterated love of cult cinema, Tarantino has proved that a film school education … [Read the Rest]
The International Society for Lynchian Consciousness
Cult Cinema: Volume 4 David Lynch films are a litmus test of intelligence. You don’t have to like them to prove that your cinematic IQ is above the level of a mouth-breather with a Vin Diesel DVD collection. But you … [Read the Rest]
Intervew With Neverlost Writer/Director Chad Archibald
Initially, I was somewhat wary of Chad Archibald’s Neverlost, the Guelph-shot genre film premiering at Fantasia tomorrow. After all, its story of a failed screenwriter living in squalor while struggling with insomnia and depression sounds like a documentary about my … [Read the Rest]
William Castle, Auteur.
Cult Cinema: Volume 3 In the 1950s, a group of French writers revolutionized film criticism with the magazine Cahiers du cinéma. By re-evaluating the films of Alfred Hitchcock, Howard Hawks, and John Hughes, among others, the critics gave birth to … [Read the Rest]
Fantasia 2010 – Interview: Herschell Gordon Lewis, Godfather of Gore
——————— The amazing thing about the horror films of Herschell Gordon Lewis is not that they were shocking in 1960s. From what I gather from classic rock radio stations and Partridge Family reruns, vibrantly coloured juice raised eyebrows prior to … [Read the Rest]
The Church of Campbell
Cult Cinema : Volume 1 Religion is a beautiful thing. Provided you’re a Paleolithic savage who needs fairy tales and a lumpy fertility idol in the shape of a BBW centerfold to explain where babies come from. Anyone else still … [Read the Rest]
Weekly Round-Table: Golden Globes and Spider-Man 4
The 2010 Golden Globes took place last night. And between Ricky Gervais camouflaging a mean bender as hosting duties and the Hollywood Foreign Press Association’s insistence on rewarding supervillain-esque megalomania over quality, there’s a lot to talk about. So, that’s … [Read the Rest]
Al Kratina is a writer and filmmaker. He makes movies about hammers, and writes about film, music, and his perpetual state of mild irritation. 
